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The Constitution of the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia
I, the founder of the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia, in an effort to promote the Truths revealed by nature and by God, which have been from the birth of this Great Nation honored and insured dignity, and which now stand in critical danger of destruction due to the pernicious and dehumanizing acts of men themselves, do ordain and establish this Constitution.
Article I.
SECTION 1. The Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia may be defined thus: an alliance of rational individuals who form an artistic, social, and political vanguard in their united stand against Facebook.
SECTION 2. The purpose of the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia is, in fine, to revive man’s ability to experience Life and to restore Hope and Beauty to the world. It seeks to accomplish this endeavor through the following means: First, by recommending an appreciation fo the uniqueness and value of each individual by denouncing of the cult of personality and discouraging the influence of peer pressure. Second, by promoting the benefits of true civilization, by persuading Americans to attain to the maturity of rational thinking, most especially through the revival of the English language, which is now nearly defunct. Third, by encouraging a sense of moral obligation by discouraging the voluptuary lifestyle and narcissistic habits of modern man and by celebrating a spirit of self sacrifice in place of self indulgence. Fourth, by building a spiritual bulwark against the techno-scientific community, whose force is now large enough to “destroy the material foundations of life.” Thus the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia seeks to help save the American culture by encouraging individuality, values, rational thinking, and moral accountability. Only a culture that possesses these elements will have the inspiration indispensable not only to produce art but also to sustain the very order and freedom upon which America rests.
Article II.
SECTION 1. The Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia will be composed of those persons who freely choose to confirm their true dedication to the causes of the League, and who otherwise meet the qualifications requisite. Following are the requirements, besides an agreement with the definition and mission of the organization, necessary to apply to the League:
No person shall be a member who does not promote the artistic, social, and political life of America.
Age will not be prescribed so long as the person is of the age of reason and is in their sane mind.
No person can rightly confirm dedication to the causes of the league who does not agree to abide to this Constitution of the League.
SECTION 2. The manner in which a person may confirm his dedication to the cause of the League is as follows: the person must leave a comment on the Join Now! page which expresses their intention to become either a member of the League. This comment must be directed to the presiding President of the league and must aptly demonstrate the person’s commitment to the cause of the League.
SECTION 3. A person who has applied to The Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia will receive notification of his acceptance or denial thereof in a timely manner. if an applicant is denied entrance into the League, the reason(s) for this denial will be clearly described in the applicant’s notification.
Article III.
SECTION 1. Persons who have joined the league will have their names added to the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia Record of Members.
SECTION 2. If a League Member makes known his intention to terminate his association with the League, he shall be promptly removed from the Record of Members. The President of the League holds the executive authority to expel a League member if he acts in obvious dissent to any of the motives of the League.
Article IV.
SECTION 1. The Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia considers itself to be worthy of men’s trust and accredited before God and man by the following reasoning: First, the League solemnly avows the unselfish and unprejudiced reasoning on which the organization is based. Second, both the means and ends of the League are in accordance with the laws of God and of nature, which have of recently been violated to an extent which not merely justifies but in fact necessitates action on the part of those who realize the injury.
Article V.
SECTION 1. The Anti-Facebook league is, in the details of its design, an American organization. However, Facebook being a global phenomenon, the League would certainly encourage resistance movements in other countries, provided that such movements are in accordance with those fundamental truths which form the foundation of the League. Interested citizens of other countries should feel free to contact the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia if they wish to develop an alliance with the League.
Done in the presence of The Holy Bible, on the 17th of September in honor of that date on which the Constitution of the United States was itself signed, in the year of our Lord 2009, and of the blessed independence of the United States of America, the 234th. In witness whereof I have hereunto subscribed my name.
Savanna J. Buckner
13 comments
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November 13, 2009 at 7:27 pm
Marissa
You’ve got some typos in there. But, else can I say? Brava! (Brava is the feminine form of “bravo.” Many people say “bravo” even when cheering on a lady.)
January 25, 2010 at 12:34 pm
Reuben Ward
To The President of The Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia,
I hereby show my willingness to become an auxiliary member of the Anti-Facebook League of Intelligentsia by stating that I think you are entirely correct about the loss in this country of individuality, moral accountability and true personal expression. And that though I currently own a Facebook page, your accurate points and flawless argument have made me rethink my involvement to the forenamed site.
I wish to subscribe my name to those already signed to this document.
Reuben E. Ward
March 31, 2010 at 1:44 pm
Kylie
You certainly did well in making those rules. I couldn’t have done better myself. (I wouldn’t even be able to make it half as long!)
August 31, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Lisa DellaVecchia
I currently own a Facebook account but have been using Facebook to speak out against Facebook. I have also drastically cut my “friends” list down to a small group of people with whom I regularly interact or with whom I have a deeper connection than “haha lol.” May I still join this league, or is it a prerequisite that we give our good-faith promise to deactivate our Facebook accounts first?
September 6, 2010 at 11:46 am
calvarypatriot
Greetings Lisa! Here is the answer to your question: you may still join as an auxiliary member, though to become a full member you must quit Facebook. So I can certainly add you as an AFLI auxiliary member right now! Thank you for your support! -S. J. Buckner
December 10, 2010 at 6:31 pm
Ahmed Usmani
Greetings from the UK,
I was once a member of Facebook (with only three friends). The reason I joined was because my close friend from university had gone back to his native Norway, and all his pictures were being posted on Facebook (he was no longer emailing stuff), so I joined to follow what is happening in his life.
But my abhorrence for Facebook and other forms of media which encourage narcissism is such that I had to delete my account, and have not had a Facebook account for over two years,
Please accept me to my club – our success in getting people to get out and about in real life will lie in our numbers.
December 10, 2010 at 6:33 pm
Ahmed Usmani
>> Please accept me to my club
I meant, please accept me to YOUR club
December 14, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Chris
I agree that Facebook is based on a self centered/self promoting/self invented format. I do not agree that any opposition to it has to fall under a “christian” belief system…sorry, you had me until I read that. Organized religion AND Facebook share many of the same negative qualities and IMHO should both be avoided. Imagine that.
May 1, 2012 at 10:38 pm
Douglas Coslet
I fully agree.
September 20, 2011 at 12:47 pm
Lady
Ditto to what “Chris” posted. I openly hate on Facebook, so you had me until I read the religious angle. Organized religion is much deadlier for this country than Facebook. This question will probably be ill received, but I will ask it anyways, would you consider removing the “God” references?
May 1, 2012 at 10:39 pm
Douglas Coslet
I also fully agree.
May 1, 2012 at 10:37 pm
Douglas Coslet
I like the idea of this website but I am completely atheist. I have been against Facebook from the start. I wish not to be judged, as Facebook does. Will I be rejected on my religious views? I also, strangely enough, love our country. Thank you, Douglas
June 25, 2012 at 9:57 pm
James Cheah
Savanna,
Thank you for endeavour in attempting to prevent the total subversion of human to human interaction.
It’s good to know that I’m not the only one who is frustrated by the antipathy of an emerging culture of lonely “connected” people.
Your efforts and the hard work of your team have are greatly appreciated by me. It is no small feat, the institution that you have created, I would be proud to be a digital member of this digital vanguard.